INSIGHTS

FINDING ANSWERS IN FURRY PLACES

FINDING ANSWERS IN FURRY PLACES

Most days, I feel like I’ve seen and heard all there is to know when it comes to relationships. I have been a therapist for decades, after all.  Then there are days that completely turn me around and remind me there’s still room for awe and surprise. One of my female...

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What Goes Around Comes Around: The Ripple Effect of Generosity

What Goes Around Comes Around: The Ripple Effect of Generosity

The critical role of generosity in personal and professional success It turns out humans are wired to be kind and giving to each other. Generosity as a practice may be cultivated everyday. The word generous isn’t the first word that comes to mind when someone talks...

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HOLDING SPACE FOR EACH OTHER WHEN YOU’RE BOTH HURTING

HOLDING SPACE FOR EACH OTHER WHEN YOU’RE BOTH HURTING

In a recent session, one of my patients said something that many of us, not just therapists, have heard many times: “We love each other, but…” It’s not hard to imagine the statements that follow the “but.” In my patient’s case they were: We can’t help poking each...

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ROLLING OUT THE DEAR DR. DEB ADVICE COLUMN

ROLLING OUT THE DEAR DR. DEB ADVICE COLUMN

Dear Dr. Deb. As a psychoanalyst and psychotherapist specializing in interpersonal relationships, it makes sense that people who are struggling would seek out my professional services – especially when they are hurting.  Through my decades of experience, I’ve...

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NEW WEBSITE LAUNCH

NEW WEBSITE LAUNCH

My newly designed website, relationshipsshrink.com, is here! For the new site, I chose a less-is-more design approach in order to highlight the rationale for the site, how you can benefit from my offerings, and my core message: Relationships Matter. As human beings,...

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MOTHER’S DAY – IS EVERY DAY

MOTHER’S DAY – IS EVERY DAY

If you ask people what their favorite holiday is, the answers range from Thanksgiving, to Christmas, to their birthdays.  I have never heard anyone respond with “My favorite holiday is Mother’s Day.” Honestly, Everyday should be Mother’s Day. I cannot think of a more...

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CAN WE AGREE TO DISAGREE ON THE SLAP HEARD AROUND THE WORLD?

CAN WE AGREE TO DISAGREE ON THE SLAP HEARD AROUND THE WORLD?

First, let me begin with what I believe we can agree on – that everyone was shocked at this year’s Oscars when actor, Will Smith, slapped comedian, Chris Rock, one of the show’s award presenters, in response to a “joke” Rock made about Smith’s wife, Jada Pinkett...

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Self Reflection in Relationships

Self Reflection in Relationships

Introduction Most people are inclined to believe that their relationships fail or have problems because they didn’t choose the right partner or because their partner is the source of the stress. It can feel so much better to look for accountability outside of yourself...

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TRIBUTE TO MY GIRL, SAVY

TRIBUTE TO MY GIRL, SAVY

Savy and I were finishing up our last walk of the day one evening last week when I tripped and fell.  I dropped her leash, which scared her, and she ran off.  Typically, she would come when I called her name, but not this time.  She was frightened.  Savy was hit in...

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Self-Talk and Why It Matters

Self-Talk and Why It Matters

If you’re worried this habit is a little strange, you can rest easy because talking to yourself is perfectly normal. During a recent consultation, I asked a patient her opinion of a work situation that she was trying to solve, and her response was the following: How...

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